THE PROBLEM

If we spent as much time identifying and focussing on what we want, as much as what we don’t want, just think how much more positive energy we would experience; and how much more forward thinking our lives would become. The problem is that it is much easier to talk about (read complain) the current negative situation we’re experiencing, than it is to focus on what we want to happen instead. Why? Because generally we perceive that changing a situation will require a lot of effort, when in reality ‘putting up with’ a negative situation places far more strain on our personal resources, and leaves us feeling drained.

OUR TOP TIPS TO SOLVE IT!

  • Assess what you’re ‘putting up with’ and make a conscious decision to change it (the easiest way to do this is by identifying what you complain about the most in your life).
  • Put all your energies into visualising what you want your situation to be like, rather than what it is like now. As you do this, don’t think about how you’re going to change it, or even what it will take to change it, for now think only of the end result
  • Shift your mindset from automatically thinking of the ‘negative’ to automatically thinking of the ‘positive’. Try this exercise. Make a conscious decision not to complain for an entire day. No matter what the day throws your way, you can only think positively about it. When a negative, complaining thought starts to creep into your mind; say no to it. Tell it to go away, and consciously assess the opportunities that could come from the situation.
  • For example, you rush to the station only to discover that your train is running 10 minutes late. Now you’ve rushed for ‘no reason’, and you have to wait for the train, which will make you late for your meeting. Don’t let your frustration takeover! Don’t let yourself begin cursing the train company, getting flustered and posting furiously on Facebook about how terrible your day is.
  • Instead, take a breath. What does this mean for you? Well, you didn’t want to miss your train, which is why you were rushing in the first place, and you haven’t; so that’s one task achieved already! You also didn’t want to be late for your meeting, but you can’t control that; the train is late and that’s that.
  • So, focus on what you can control (just stay in your three-foot world), and what you do want, such as; to arrive at your meeting in a professional manner, and leave your meeting with certain objectives achieved. Whilst you may now arrive slightly later, you have effectively gained an extra 10 minutes, as you wait for the train, in which you can sit calmly and go over your meeting preparation, and outcomes, so that when you do arrive, you are feeling mentally prepared rather than aggravated and flustered. Voila!

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